Enjoying Valentine's Day When You're Single

Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock since Christmas, you will probably be aware that Valentine’s Day is coming up next week. Anyone that knows me or who follows my YouTube channel will know that I’m single (I made a video last year about looking for love with a chronic illness) and that I feel pretty crap about it. I like to think of myself as a bit of a professional singleton these days, so I’m well versed at getting through one or two (and the rest!) Valentine’s Days on my own. Now, I know that in reality, February 14^th is just another day and that really, we should be expressing our love every day of the year. And I also know that being in a relationship isn’t all roses and smiles. But that doesn’t take away from the fact that it does remind me of being on my own. So I thought I would share a few fun tips for enjoying Valentine’s Day when you’re single.

Celebrate Galentine’s Day

Galentine’s Day is a non-official holiday, celebrated on the 13^th February. It’s an opportunity to remember your gals (or pals) rather than celebrating romantic relationships. I love the idea of a day specifically focused on telling your friends how much you love them. Yes, we should be communicating our appreciation for our friends every day, but we all know that that just doesn’t happen. Life gets in the way, and before you know it you’ve gone a few months without seeing your bestie. So why not use this time of year to really show your friends how much they mean to you. You could do something as little as sending them a text or a cute card, or if you’re feeling flush, why not treat them to a special present that you know they’ve been lusting after? Or if you want to go all out, take them on a date!

Embrace some self-love

One thing I do really love about Valentine’s Day is the focus on love. Of course, the biggest emphasis is on romantic love between two people, but if you’re not in a relationship (or even if you are) why not use it as an excuse to show yourself a bit of love and care. I think all of us are probably guilty of neglecting ourselves and putting other people first. And while it’s no bad thing to be selfless, putting yourself first once in a while doesn’t have to be a selfish act. There’s so much being said about self-care at the moment, and I truly believe it’s one of the most important things you can do. There’s a quote that says: “You can’t pour from an empty cup” that really helped me to understand the importance of self-care. How can you be there for other people if you’re running on empty? So showing yourself a bit of love this Valentine’s Day could encompass literally anything – from spending a bit of money on something you’ve been lusting after to running yourself a bubbly bath or setting aside half an hour to read some of your favourite book.

Invite some friends over for dinner

If you enjoy a bit of cooking and you’ve got a few single friends, why not invite them over for a yummy dinner? Now I’ll admit, I’m no Nigella, but it can be good fun to get a few friends over, pick a new recipe (or an old favourite) and cook some good food for everyone. I love that satisfaction you get being able to feed people you care about and, hopefully, getting some great feedback. Or if you’re not a very confident chef, get your friends to come a bit earlier and all cook together – believe me there will be plenty of laughs! If cooking really feels too scary and you’re concerned your kitchen will end up looking like a toddler has emptied the contents of your fridge everywhere, invite your group over for a takeaway instead. It will not only be better than trying to book a meal out (which would cost a fortune and mean you’re surrounded by couples) but it will provide a great distraction, as well as a chance to spend some quality time with people you love.

Remind yourself of the good things about being single

This one is a bit easier said than done, but I promise you it is possible (if someone like me can manage it, then I guarantee anyone can!) Especially this time of year, when the media are trying to remind you of how amazing it is to be in a relationship (they seem to forget to mention the hard bits!) it can be difficult to think of anything else. But that also makes it a great time to try and think of all the good things about being single, and remind yourself that where you are now isn’t all bad. For example, I always remind myself that I don’t have to consider anyone else’s opinion if I want to, say, go out somewhere or spend all weekend curled up on the sofa binge-watching episodes of Friends. I’m not saying that people in relationships don’t have their own free will, but being part of a partnership does mean you have two people’s views to consider. Yes, there are a lot of things I would love to have from being in a relationship with someone, but the fact is, I’m single. So it’s about trying to be grateful for what you do have, rather than feeling sad about what you don’t.

Have a spa day

On the same lines as practicing some self-love, I think Valentine’s Day is the perfect excuse to book yourself in for some much deserved pampering (not that I think you need an excuse – as far as I’m concerned, any reason for a spa day is OK by me!) But I think a bit of indulgence now and again is good for everyone. One of my personal favourites is Champneys - I’ve been to their Forest Mere Spa a couple of times and absolutely loved it both times. But there are so many gorgeous spas around the country – it won’t be hard to find the right one for you. If you can’t stretch to a fancy spa visit, that shouldn’t stop you treating yourself to some pampering. You could go and get your nails done, or book in for a massage or facial with your local beauty therapist. Or you could even do a DIY spa day – dig out some nice skincare bits from the back of your cupboard, light some candles, put on some relaxing music and set aside an evening for pampering yourself.

Buy yourself some flowers

I always think it’s lovely to be bought flowers (not that it happens to me very often!) Whenever a friend or family member has given me a bunch of flowers, I can’t help but smile and feel all warm and fuzzy inside. And having fresh flowers around the house, especially while the weather is still cold and grey, really helps to brighten up the place and lift my mood. But like I said, being given flowers isn’t a regular occurrence, so I like to treat myself to a bunch now and again. Usually mine just come from the supermarket - you can get some real bargains – this week I picked up a bunch of beautiful rainbow tulips from Tesco for only £6! If you’re thinking of treating yourself to some blooms this Valentine’s Day though, my biggest tip would be to wait and buy them the day after. Shops usually put prices up around February 14^th, but more often than not, you will go in the day after and find a huge amount of stock still for sale, but at a reduced price – bargain!

Forget about dating apps for the day

I’m terrible for whiling away the hours flicking through Tinder – swiping left and right until that message comes up telling me there’s no-one left in my area (how depressing is that?!) Sometimes it can make me feel like I’m being proactive, but a lot of the time I just end up feeling disillusioned that I’m still single and can’t seem to find The One. So, just for a day, leave the dating apps and websites alone and focus on having some fun. The last thing you want to be doing on Valentine’s Day is scrolling through hundreds of pictures, making yourself feel even worse about being single when it feels like everyone else is out on dates. Plus I’ve found that the V Day seems to attract some ‘interesting’ people to the world of online dating – believe me when I say they are best avoided until the hype has calmed down a bit!

Organise/take part in a Valentine’s Secret Santa

My last tip for enjoying Valentine’s Day when you’re single, is to take part in a Secret Santa. Now, I know what you’re thinking – Christmas was two months ago! But this Secret Santa is specifically for Valentine’s. I’ve been doing this with some friends I met through the chronic illness community for a number of years, and it really makes this time of a year a bit nicer. Someone simply takes everyone’s names and secretly matches you up with a person to send a card (and sometimes a present) to – just like Secret Santa. It means that, even if you’re single on Valentine’s Day, you still end up getting something through the post to open. There are plenty of cute cards out there that aren’t too soppy and are perfect for this kind of thing. If you don’t have a group of friends to do this with, search the hashtags on Instagram or Twitter for Secret Valentine and you’re bound to find someone organising one. You never know – you might even find a new friend (or more!)

I really hope this has given you a few fun ideas to help you enjoy Valentine’s Day this year, whether you’re single or in a relationship. I’ve also filmed a video talking about this, which you can find on my YouTube Channel. However you’re celebrating Valentine’s Day this year, I hope it will help you remember how much you are loved.

What I’m wearing:

Jumper – Primark

Denim Leggings – Next

Rainbow Dr Martens - Schuh

Are you a fan of Valentine’s Day? How will you be celebrating this year?

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Week in Photos - 26th November 2017

I haven’t felt that great this week to be honest. Although I seem to have almost got rid of the virus I’ve had for the last few weeks, I just seem to be feeling pretty down, wiped out and run down. Basically, all I want to do is stay in bed and sleep. But this week has been crazy busy with university and appointments, so that hasn’t been an option. I don’t really like being negative on here, but I also think it’s important to acknowledge when things are a bit crap – this is meant to be about my life after all. Somehow, I need to find some motivation and get myself back on track again.

After taking some time off, I was back at Uni on Monday for another news day. I had to edit together a pretty serious video about railway suicides. So I decided to treat myself to a Christmas Starbucks in one of their cute Christmassy cups. I noticed they also had some adorable ceramic Christmas mugs in the shop, which I’m so tempted to go back and buy (although I’m not quite sure where I will put it – my mug collection is getting pretty big!) Thankfully, my news package got some amazing feedback from my course leader and another lecturer. They’ve even recommended that I enter it into a competition, which was a massive complement. I’ll be sharing it on my YouTube very soon, so keep your eyes peeled.

Freddie always manages to spread himself out in the most uncomfortable looking positions! Yet somehow still manages to look cosy and cute. He’s particularly loving my Dunelm teddy bear blanket at the moment!

It’s been so dark, cold and gloomy recently and as I mentioned, I’ve been struggling with my mental health quite a bit. So when I popped into Waitrose to get some cash out, I decided to pick up these beautiful autumnal flowers to go in our kitchen. How gorgeous are those roses.

My Mum has made our kitchen look nice and cosy with fairy lights. There’s a heart hanging from one of the windows and then three lanterns, all from Waitrose. I always like to use lots of fairy lights and candles this time of year. It helps to make the darkness a bit less dark.

I received these amazing Dr Martens for my birthday last month and completely forgot to share a photo of them with you! So here they are – have you ever seen anything quite so pretty?! I will definitely feel like some kind of mermaid unicorn when I wear these. There’s a ‘What I got for my birthday’ video up over on my YouTube channel.

On Thursday, my Dad and I took the train up to Denmark Hill for my appointment at Kings College Hospital. I had to do some exercise tests where they monitored my breathing, oxygen saturation, heart rate and blood pressure. I knew it would be hard, but oh my goodness it completely knocked me out. I ended up having to give up before I passed out, so I hope they got what they needed. Because I was so wiped out afterwards, they told me to go down to Costa and get some sugar in me (and who was I to say no?!)

Our boy is doing so well since his surgery – he’s such a fighter. Considering how poorly he was only a short while ago, he’s done fantastically. This week he had his stitches taken out in two stages, but unfortunately he’s still got to wear the inflatable collar (which he’s not impressed with at all!) but it’s so he doesn’t re-open the wound. It’s good to have the real Alfie back again.

A few years ago, I started a little tradition that each year I would buy a new Christmas film. I’m building up quite a collection, so it’s getting more and more difficult to find films to add. But this year, after getting recommendations from some Facebook friends, I picked up a box set of Santa Clause films and also The Nightmare Before Christmas. So I’m looking forward to watching these over the next few weeks.

My Mum and I went over to Richard and Lisa’s yesterday to see the bunnies, Benjie and Beatrix. They’re so cute and fluffy, so it was nice to have a little cuddle.

You can check out my YouTube channel here, where I have recently uploaded a few new videos (and hope to continue doing!)

I’m also trying to post on Snapchat a bit more, so if you fancy following me, my username is Jennycole44.

If you don’t already, please give me a follow on Bloglovin here - I can’t believe I’ve managed to hit 800 followers now! Thank you all so much. I’m planning a giveaway as soon as I can get some bits together!

What have you been up to this week? I always enjoy hearing about your news and adventures!

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Sunday Snippets - 12th March 2017

This week has been reasonably quiet, which has been nice because it’s given me the chance to take things a bit more easily and get some rest. Thankfully my virus seems to have finally gone, although I’m still struggling with a sore throat. For a few days this week, it has actually started to feel like spring! The sun has been shining, the daffodils and crocuses are out and I was able to go out without a thick coat on! However, I woke up today and it’s pouring with rain – typical!

I forgot to share this first photo with you in last week’s Sunday Snippets, so thought I would pop it in here. There was a beautiful double rainbow last Saturday afternoon after a massive downpour. I always think of my friend, Tasha, when I see one. I’m sure she’s up there in the sky, riding her unicorn over the rainbow.

Last Sunday morning my Mum dropped me round at my friend, Katrina’s, house (well, her parents’ house). We had a good chat and I finally gave her her Christmas present! She lives in Ireland so it was really lovely to see her. When my Mum brought me home, I sorted out my medication for the week ahead and rested for a bit. After lunch, I watched The Simpsons and wrote and uploaded a blog post. I then edited some photos and got another post scheduled to go up in the week. I felt pretty exhausted, so curled up on the sofa and sorted through some old magazines. I spent the rest of the afternoon doing some Law reading for Uni. I wasn’t able to eat much dinner because my acid reflux was really bad. In the evening I opened my Topshop order – this adorable pastel yellow rain mac.

My Dad took me over to Uni on Monday morning. We spent the morning putting together various radio bulletins and finding our own stories to include. We all went to the canteen at lunch for a break and a chat. In the afternoon we went out into Farnham to get vox pops, which is always a challenge! My Dad picked me up early, as my Mum had managed to get me an emergency doctor’s appointment. I saw my GP – she was at a bit of a loss for what to do with regards to my reflux problems. She suggested that I try increasing my Ranitidine to see if it helps, but I’m going to have to talk it through with my specialist when I see him in August. It feels so far away, but if things get really bad perhaps my GP can contact them. I am also able to reduce my iron tablets a bit, as my iron levels are finally OK. When I got home I dozed on the sofa with this little chap. I was really struggling with eating – nothing seems to be getting any better and I felt quite alone with it all.

I overslept on Tuesday morning and could happily have stayed in bed! But I had to get over to Uni, so my Mum drove me over. The fire alarm went off just as we were going up to the classroom, which was slightly frustrating! We spent the morning working on our narrative long-form pieces. It’s all very overwhelming at the moment. I wore my funky Dr. Martens boots though, which made me smile. My Dad brought me home at lunchtime and after I’d had my Fortisip I fell asleep on the sofa with Freddie for a while. I seem to be even more exhausted than normal at the moment. I spent the rest of the afternoon writing some penpal letters and watching Couples Come Dine With Me.

I had a pretty long lie-in on Wednesday morning, but still had so little energy. I managed to put a bit of make-up on though and filmed a collective haul for my YouTube channel of some of the bits I’ve bought over the last few months. Once I’d filmed, I tidied everything away, which took quite a while. I was exhausted by that point, so curled up on the sofa, had my Fortisip, watched The Coroner and caught up on my Uni emails. Then I watched a couple of episodes of Silent Witness and worked on my court reports and freedom of information article. I opened some post and did a couple of my physio exercises. I was in so much pain and so exhausted.

I had another lie-in on Thursday morning, which was so appreciated. I spent the morning writing and uploading a blog post, and then editing a video for my YouTube channel. I’d hope to get it uploaded too, but ran out of time and energy in the end. I chilled out on the sofa in the afternoon and watched a bit of TV. I also did some preparation for an article I’ve got to write for my Uni portfolio. At the moment I’m not actually sure how I’m going to get it written in time for the deadline. My Mum had a guided injection in her hand in the morning so wasn’t able to drive. So I took her down to Waitrose in the afternoon so we could get a few bits for dinner. They had loads of daffodils in various tones of yellow and orange outside the store, which looked so pretty and made me feel that spring is definitely on its way. I had the headache from hell in the evening though, which was making me feel super crappy.

I got up late, again, on Friday! I really need to sort out my sleeping routine and get myself to bed earlier. A bit back I was doing really well with it, but I’ve gone off track. My Dad drove me over to Uni. In the morning we were doing more work on dissertation preparation, and then at the end of the lecture I had a chat with my course leader about my ideas for my dissertation proposal. At lunchtime I met up with my mentor and had a chat. Then we had Law in the afternoon, which was pretty heavy going. We were mainly talking about the law surrounding reporting health crises and terror. I felt pretty rubbish when I got home, so spent a while just resting on the sofa. My sister, Bekkah, had some friends round to celebrate her 18^th birthday – I loved her pink and gold theme! I was feeling quite down in the evening – I’m really struggling with my weight and body image. I know some of my weight is because at the moment I’m not digesting/getting rid of food due to my dysmotility and Gastroparesis, and that I can lose it really quickly if my sickness flares up. But it’s really triggering my eating disorder and it’s hard trying to fight both illnesses at the same time.

I wanted to have a girly day with my Mum on Saturday, so in the morning we made our way over to Festival Place in Basingstoke for some retail therapy. Our first stop was Primark where I bought this adorable Pusheen t-shirt and some other bits (I’m hoping to do a haul on my YouTube soon if I can get my computer storage sorted). We looked round a few more shops but didn’t buy anything, and then went to Starbucks for some lunch. Once we’d had a bit of a rest we looked round a few more shops and I found a gorgeous top in Monsoon that I’d seen in Emily Norris’ YouTube video but it was out of stock online so I thought I wouldn’t be able to get it! When we got home I was completely wiped out, so had a nap on the sofa and then watched some TV.

You can check out my YouTube channel here, where I have recently uploaded a few new videos (and hope to continue doing!)

I’m also trying to post on Snapchat a bit more, so if you fancy following me, my username is Jennycole44.

If you don’t already, please give me a follow on Bloglovin here - I would love to reach 800 followers and we’re so nearly there! I do have a little giveaway planned for when I get there!

What have you been up to this week? I always enjoy hearing about your news and adventures!

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