A while ago, I received an email from Sarah Mozer, asking if I would be interested in reviewing her book on my blog. Once she’d explained a bit more about her book and the story behind it, I was really keen to work with Sarah, as it sounded like a book I, and therefore my readers, might really benefit from. The back of the book describes it all perfectly, so I thought I’d start by just sharing what it says…
“A raw and emotional collection of poetry on life with severe chronic illness. Both heart-breaking and hopeful, these poems follow the story of how as a bedbound twenty-something, I found the courage and resilience to keep going when every part of me was saying give up.
The Words That Saved Me was written and compiled over three years from the confines of my bed – beginning in the darkest depths of depression and continuing as I began to find the possibility of peace amongst the pain, limitations, and isolation I was, and still am facing. This book is a reminder of how life can get better even when it truly feels impossible.
Whether you have experienced chronic illness or not, I hope the words in this book resonate with you in some way and that by sharing my soul with you, your soul hurst a little less.”
The book is broken down into sections, starting with an introduction that tells you a bit about Sarah and her experience of chronic illness. She discusses the different emotional stages she has been through during her chronic illness journey, and offers inspiration for others who may currently be in a dark place.
Following on from the introduction, the next few chapters take us through the different emotional stages, from darkness, to sparks of hope and finishing with helpful things. I thought it might be useful for me to talk to you about each stage in turn, and how I found the poems in that section.
So we’ll start with darkness – a section I can relate to a lot at the moment. The poems in this section are incredibly raw and blunt, communicating the desperate place that Sarah found herself in. As someone who is currently going through a relapse in their mental health, I felt I could really relate to a lot of the poems and how I’m currently feeling. One poem in particular stood out to me – it’s called Frayed and I wanted to share it with you:
“How much can I endure?
When is enough enough?
At what point will it all become too much.
I try
And I try
Holding on to threads of hope
As they fray to single strands,
I can’t fight this fight forever.”
The book then moves onto ‘The Words I Need to Hear’, and it reminds me of a big hug from a loving friend. As you make your way through the pages, you are reassured and comforted by kind words, just as a best friend would do to you if you were in the dark place spoken about at the beginning of the book. Like I said, I’m really struggling with my mental health at the moment, and I found reading these words a real comfort. Words such as “If all you did today was exist, then to exist was your purpose. Maybe is seems like a waste, but you are here for a reason,’ from the poem Stardust and Magic.
We then progress to ‘Spark of Hope’ where you get a sense of a real shift in Sarah’s mental state. Suddenly, rather than living in darkness, you can feel hope and optimism, albeit fairly tentative. She still acknowledges the darkness and how overwhelming it can be, but you feel drawn into the fact it seems possible to move forward and onto something a bit more positive. I really liked the poem ‘Surrender’ in this section, particularly these lines:
“Anger
Frustration
And sadness
Will not help you here.
Put down those weapons
They will only cause you more pain.
Instead;
Choose acceptance,
Choose peace.
Find the strength
To surrender to this moment
Exactly as it is.”
Following this, we move on to ‘Light in her eyes.’ You can really feel the determination in the poems in this section to live a more positive life and move away from the darkness. Sometimes I find that when you get these positive quotes and sayings that they can feel quite fake or patronising, but these poems don’t feel any of those things. The positivity and determination feels real and raw, like it’s come from a place of real hard work to move forward to that place. Through the poems you can learn how Sarah fought against those dark thoughts and how she continues to fight to live in a more positive place. I really liked the poems in this section, as they made me feel really inspired. I particularly like the poem ‘Believe:’
“I don’t know why I am where I am,
Maybe there is no reason or plan.
But I choose to believe
I’m where I’m supposed to be,
Because that is the thought
That sets me free.”
At the end of the book are a couple of pages under the heading ‘Helpful Things.’ These aren’t poems but are instead some information that Sarah hopes other chronically ill people may find helpful. She shares a variety of treatments, management techniques and resources that have helped her in her chronic illness journey to living a better quality of life. Whilst unsolicited advice is usually something people in the chronic illness community step away from, it’s interesting to hear what other chronically ill people have found helpful, especially when your illness has no cure or real treatment options.
Overall, I’m so glad Sarah sent me her book to review. I found it genuinely inspirational, comforting and relatable. I don’t think you need to be chronically ill to enjoy Sarah’s book either, as I believe the poems could relate to all kinds of situations, not just illness. If you’d like to support a chronically ill writer, you can buy Sarah’s book on Amazon and she is also selling signed copies on Etsy.
Have you read Sarah’s poetry book? I’d love to hear what your thought on it are?
