52 Lists - Week 3

As you probably know, I’ve decided to give the 52 Lists Project by Morrea Seal a go, and yes, I am incredibly late to this particular party! If you haven’t heard of it, the basic premise is that a list subject has been created for every week of the year, so each week you print off your list template, complete it and pop it in a folder. At the end of a year you will then have 52 different lists, which should tell you a lot about yourself. Yes, you are probably meant to start this project at the beginning of the year, but hey, when was I ever one to conform?!

This week I had a go at list number 3, which was asking you to list the things you should be proud of. I found this week’s list incredibly difficult to complete because I find it very difficult to allow myself to think good things about myself. I think it was a good exercise to complete though because it really pushed me to be kinder to myself.

This was definitely a good list for me to try out, as it made me reflect on my whole life. I’m often very down on myself because I feel like I haven’t achieved all the things I would like to because of being unwell. I often convince myself that I am a failure and it’s easy to believe these negative labels I assign myself. So, doing this list really pushed me to challenge my negative thoughts and think of things I can be proud of. I actually managed to come up with quite a few things in the end, although getting myself to believe what I’ve written is another thing! I noticed in my notes that there are different categories of things I can be proud of.

There are physical achievements such as getting my GCSE’s or writing my blog, where I have something very concrete to show for my achievements. And I am really proud of myself for achieving these things. When I did my GCSE’s I was terribly unwell, yet I was still determined and driven and managed to sit 7 exams, which I think is pretty darn amazing. But there are also more figurative, personal achievements that I feel immensely proud of. The first thing I wrote on my list that I was proud of was ‘I am still alive’ and I really do feel that this is my biggest achievement. There have been so many times I have come close to death, even before I was born, yet I am still here, fighting every single day. And when it comes down to it, above everything else, that is all anyone can ask of you. To wake up each and every day and fight as hard as you can to make it through to the end of the day. Then wake up tomorrow and do the same thing again.

What words and phrases would be on your list for this week?

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