Sunday Snippets - 17th January 2016

The last week has been fairly hectic with one thing and another, and it has definitely got a lot colder over the last few days. I’m finding it has really taken a toll on my hands, making them feel really dry and sore, but it has meant that I could finally wear the warm Superdry coat that I got for my birthday! We even got a light dusting of snow this morning, which looked really pretty, but now it’s raining again, surprise surprise!

Last Sunday I spent a lot of my day writing blog posts so that I could schedule a couple in during the week. I don’t think a lot of people realise how much work and time goes into keeping a blog and YouTube channel. I often see comments from non-bloggers about people who blog/make videos as their full time job, saying it’s not a proper job, but I can promise you it is! I don’t blog for a living so have other work to do as well, but putting regular posts up every week takes a lot of work, not to mention when you start making videos as well. You’ve got to plan things carefully, write and rewrite posts, set up equipment and actually film the videos, and then spend hours editing them so they look polished before uploading them. Don’t get me wrong, I’m in no way complaining about any of this because I choose to do it, but I guess I just wish those doubters could understand that it’s a lot more than just faffing about! Anyway, back to my Sunday. I didn’t feel too great if I’m honest, so apart from doing lots of blogging I just rested and did a few other small jobs. A couple of parcels had arrived the day before, so I opened those – they were belated Christmas presents and a lovely surprise.

On Monday morning I had Uni for a couple of hours as we were preparing for an assessment. I felt like I did nothing for the rest of the afternoon because I didn’t really move from the sofa, but if I take a step back I can see that I did actually get lots of little jobs done. I sorted out my university planner, which always makes me feel a bit better as I like to feel organised! I also decided to clear my friends list on Facebook and start again. It probably sounds rather drastic, but I did warn people before hand and didn’t clear the people who commented saying they wanted to stay in touch. I’d been thinking about having a clear out for ages because I had so many ‘friends’ on Facebook, most of whom I never spoke to, and it just seemed silly to have that many people. It was also impacting on my mental health, seeing people who I used to be really close to doing things with their new friends. I felt like a lot of the relationships were very unequal, and it was really knocking my self-esteem knowing I was the one always having to initiate contact. So, in the end, I felt the best way to deal with it was to completely start again. That way, I would stay in touch with the people who wanted to, because they would either tell me before hand or add me back afterwards. I have to admit although I still feel very anxious about it, I also feel like a massive weight has been lifted. This ‘Calm’ book came just at the right time, and I’m really looking forward to reading it.

Tuesday began with another hospital appointment, this time with my physio. We chatted about how things have been and how I’m getting on with my exercises (not brilliantly at the moment!) and then he offered to give me a session of acupuncture. It’s something I’ve been considering for a while, but just haven’t got round to sorting it out. I didn’t realise I could get it on the NHS, so thought I would give it a try! It was quite a strange experience and I’m not really sure how to describe it. We only did a few needles this time, some in my neck and some in my lower back. I could feel when he put the needles in, kind of like a little scratch, and then when he turned the needles I could feel a sort of pulling sensation. I then had to lie there for about 15 minutes, and after a while my head and neck suddenly started feeling really warm, which he said was OK. I can’t decide if I’ve noticed any improvement since having it done, but I’ve got another session coming up so we’ll see how it goes. After my physio we came home and my brother popped round to open his birthday presents. My Mum and I then went over to Tesco for a few bits, and I picked up this book to see if it can give me any help with this new diet, as I’m meant to cut out sugar.

On Wednesday I had another hospital appointment, and this time it was with my mental health care co-ordinator. We spent a long time chatting and the question of what my diagnosis is came up again. I’m finding it very difficult with this uncertainty over what is actually wrong with me – I’ve got one person saying they think I have Bipolar and another saying I have a personality disorder. In a way it doesn’t matter what label I’m given, but I do want to be getting the right treatment and at the moment nothing seems to be working. She’s said she will get me an appointment with the psychiatrist, as I said I hadn’t seen her for over a year and surely I should at least be reviewed, but I can’t see anything particularly ground breaking coming out of that meeting. I then had a quiet afternoon trying to catch up with all my blog emails, as I hadn’t checked them since before Christmas (oops!) I also received a lovely letter from my penpal Jo, which really made me smile. I’ve been so terrible at keeping on top of anything over the last few months. I’ve got a pile of penpal letters to respond to, my inbox is overflowing with unchecked emails, my bedroom is a complete mess and it’s all just making me feel very anxious and overwhelmed. So I’m trying to make a to-do list and break it down so I do a couple of things each day.

Thursday is my full day at Uni so I sometimes find it hard to find something to take a photo of. We do lots of exciting stuff there, but I don’t always feel comfortable getting my phone out and taking a snap! We did another television news broadcast this week and I got to direct in the gallery, which was so much fun but incredibly stressful! There are so many buttons you have to press at the right time and four or five different screens to keep track of. But it was a lot of fun having a play with it and hopefully the more I do it the easier it will get. On the way home I asked my Dad if we could pop into Waitrose as I needed to pick something up. Anyone that knows me will know how terrible I am when it comes to going to the supermarket. I’m one of those people who simply cannot just go into a shop and pick up the one thing I went in there for! I always end up coming out with a basket full of other things that I never knew I needed! This time I wasn’t too bad, but I did pick up these beautiful pastel roses for my bedroom, as I haven’t had any flowers in there since before Christmas.

On Friday we had another full day at Uni, which we don’t normally do but we had to go in for an assessment in the morning. Thankfully it only lasted an hour, which meant I had a two-hour break before my next commitment. So, my friend Nina and I decided to go into town for a coffee. We went to Caffé Nero this time and both had a gingerbread latte (although mine was decaf) and spent quite a while chatting. Nina then pushed me back to Uni, and was doing really well until we hit some uneven ground and I went flying forward in slow motion! Thankfully I didn’t fall out, but we were in fits of giggles the rest of the way! I met up with my Learning Mentor and we went through my work and timetable for the next week. I started to come over feeling really faint and sick, and this continued through the afternoon lecture, which wasn’t much fun, so I was glad to get home and rest.

Yesterday was fairly productive, which is always nice! I woke up fairly early (for me!) and couldn’t get back to sleep, which is typical when it’s the day you can have a lie in! I spent the morning taking photos and videos for my blog and YouTube channel. I just need to get my head around the new editing software I have on my computer now so I can get my posts and videos up! In the afternoon I snuggled up on the sofa and wrote a couple of letters – it was so lovely to start writing again, although I realised that I really need to sort out all my writing paper/stickers etc.! These gorgeous flowers arrived at my door at around lunchtime, which completely surprised me and made me smile, so thank you to my lovely friend Clare for those.

If you haven’t read my blog before, I just wanted to let you know that I have a second blog, which mainly focuses on my health in more depth than I talk about it here. It’s largely for friends and family to follow and keep up with what’s going on, but if it’s something you would be interested in reading as well, you are more than welcome to follow me over there. It’s called Unicorns and Floral Crowns and you can find it by clicking here. I haven’t updated it for a while, but I hope to get into a routine soon. I’m also trying to post on Snapchat a bit more, so if you fancy following me, my username is Jennycole44.

What have you been up to this week? I always enjoy hearing about your news and adventures!

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